PENALTIES FOR ASSAULT

In Scotland new guidelines issued by the Crown Office have advised that people accused of "minor" assaults (apparently defined as those requiring less tha three stitches) should no longer be prosecuted before a court but be subject to a fine of up to £300. Previously a court might, and often did, hand down a prison sentence. Our police are rapidly becoming little more than tax-collectors. Politicians, prosecutors, the legal profession, lily-livered judges are failing in their duty to the public. And on my way back from the newsagent's shop there is a notice attached to a lamp-post advising me that it is an offence to drop litter and I could face a fine of £2000. Pity I'm the sort of person who doesn't go round knocking old ladies on the head as it looks like a cheaper hobby.

OLYMPIC TORCH

The torch continues its progress around the world after some farcical scenes in London and Paris. I have every sympathy with the people of Tibet but feel little antipathy towards China. My ire is directed at the whole idea of the Olympic Games. I was against the idea of them coming to London in 2012. Current events may be a warning that the experience may not be a happy one in spite of the vast expense. Clearly it suits our empire-building politicians and the sportsmen themselves.

LUNT

The English village is having some minor problems because yobs and vandals are changing the road signs by replacing the first letter with a "c". Martyn Ball thinks the name should be changed to "Launt". It seems to me this will solve nothing as it assumes that it will not occur to the yobs to cross out the "a" after replacing the "L". But more basic is that this is giving in to the yobs — once again they will have won. Needless to say the man is an ex-police officer (and a prospective councillor) so the idea that an effective police force should apprehend these vandals and punish them is outside his ken. It's nice to see that some villagers with a sense of history don't want to make a change. A pity horse-whipping is no longer an option

ZIMBABWE

Quite a lot of pious outrage in the UK press about Mugabe and the recent elections. The signs are that like Wendy Alexander he's pushed electoral procedure to its legal limits and like Michael Martin and the Conway guy he's probably done well out of expenses. But if British politics continues on its present path it will not be long before we are the new Zimbabwe.