LUNT

The English village is having some minor problems because yobs and vandals are changing the road signs by replacing the first letter with a "c". Martyn Ball thinks the name should be changed to "Launt". It seems to me this will solve nothing as it assumes that it will not occur to the yobs to cross out the "a" after replacing the "L". But more basic is that this is giving in to the yobs — once again they will have won. Needless to say the man is an ex-police officer (and a prospective councillor) so the idea that an effective police force should apprehend these vandals and punish them is outside his ken. It's nice to see that some villagers with a sense of history don't want to make a change. A pity horse-whipping is no longer an option

ZIMBABWE

Quite a lot of pious outrage in the UK press about Mugabe and the recent elections. The signs are that like Wendy Alexander he's pushed electoral procedure to its legal limits and like Michael Martin and the Conway guy he's probably done well out of expenses. But if British politics continues on its present path it will not be long before we are the new Zimbabwe.

POLICE TARGETS

A few months ago I was caught by police for not wearing a seat-belt on a short trip to get the morning paper (I normally walk but not this day). They filled in the documentation and drove back to base to collect their points and I went to the council to pay the fine. I refrained from asking why they weren't out chasing "real" criminals. But after they left a passer-by said that he had been in the town a few evenings earlier and a large group of youngsters were creating mayhem. Not a copper in sight. Possibly just a simple, small police presence was all that was needed.
Yesterday the head of the Police Federation hit the nail on the head when she said that government targets mean that some forces will make a playground incident between children a statistical "crime" (when in the past a quiet word would have done the trick, assuming police were involved at all). She said there is a growing perception that police are targetting "middle England" (and polite geriatrics) rather than dealing with more serious crimes (and proper thugs). How right she is. As she says there is nothing wrong with targets per se but they have to be the right targets.

And I'm certainly not saying that police shouldn't pull up people who are not wearing a seat-belt. Just that it's beginning to look as if police priorities are skewed towards dealing with this sort of offence at the expense of others. Jan Berry, the head in question, made a comment to the effect that police were "spending too much time inside counting things instead of outside doing things"

BBC AND THE QUEEN

Reports in yesterday's press claim that the BBC is preparing for the death of Elizabeth II by seeking out people who will be prepared to mount a critical attack on her on the night of her death. I am pleased to say they are not having much success so far. It seems even some famous people well known for a republican political stance are refusing either because of the personal qualities of our present monarch or because they find the timing distasteful. Perhaps they judge the likely mood of her people better than those smug BBC apparatniks. For myself I believe she has served this country well. I think Charles will do the same. President Tony with Presidentess Cherie would not only be a disaster but also a very expensive one.

VISTA

Just had to buy a new PC as a result of a major crash. Fortunately almost all my data was backed up and I lost only a few bits and pieces. Naturally the new one came with Vista. My God! — is it slow!! The old one under XP was much faster even though the new one has twice the RAM (about 2GB).

HEALTH AND SAFETY TALIBAN

The boss of West Yorkshire Police has raised a few hackles by references to the Health and Safety Taliban. He believes that H and S concerns can make it easier for police to do nothing in a crisis. Talking about the recent Menezes case when the Metropolitan force were prosecuted for H and S offences he described the trial as "a triumph for health and safety, a lucrative new territory for lawyers, and a disaster for common sense". He suggests that the armchair H and S Taliban are creating doubt in situation where there was once certainty.
Lisa Fowlie, one of the Taliban leaders (actually President of the Institute of Occupational Safety and Health), claims they are making the country a safer place.
The rest of us can only be thankful that West Yorkshire have a man of sense at the helm.

HSE

An Aberdeenshire landowner gave a pensioner friend permission to cut down a dead tree for firewood. The tree fell badly killing the old man. His children, who were with him, his widow and the police all say it was an unfortunate accident. The widow does not hold the landowner in any way responsible. But Health and Safety Executive are still investigating, at great expense, and may prosecute. Perhaps if they have staff to waste on this tragic event they should transfer some to Maidstone where people are dying by the busload in local hospitals.